in 1986 2 kids got together, and made some bad choices. Hey it happens. One of them went off to join the Army where he found out he was now a daddy, however, in the instant he found out he was a daddy, he also found out his baby was going somewhere else. This sickly little blond haired boy was giving to a wonderful loving, Christian family who nurtured and raised him, and he grew up to be a Gospel Singer. For 25 years this child live a fairly happy life, then one fateful night in Tennessee he got the call.
I'll never forget sitting in Freddie Edwards' theory class at Stamps thinking actually on the conversation I'd been having with Meg about actually my biological parents (in case you missed it, the boy above is me) and how it didn't really matter to me if I found them or not, I was happy with the ones I had, and besides it'd been 25 years who knew if these people were even still alive. Suddenly my phone began to vibrate. It was Andrea, my girlfriend/pianist/ect., I wondered what she wanted she knew I was in class and didn't really have time to answer, but she called again and again. I knew it had to be important. She left a crying voicemail about something very important she had to tell me but it could wait. I called her back.
She had inadvertently uncovered my biological mother who told her of how I'd died in the hospital and had to be revived, and who my real father was and how I now had 4 siblings, and all of this. I collapsed I sat on a bench in front of Stephen Hill's class room, I wished my mentor and friend was there with some advice. I couldn't breathe. Every emotion filling my soul. I remember holding in tears as I told Megan. I remember sitting on a stool a million miles away when Keri Spivey came and hugged me. (She was an adopted kid too) It was rough, but I made it through. I knew it had to be an attack from the enemy something to shake me to the very core. I remember singing "God's Been Good" that night I'm not sure if anyone could tell but I was shaking and crying, I was a mess, but somehow comforted as I got through it.
Stamps, ended. Meg went home, as did I. I spent my usual week singing in Branson and enjoying a mini vaca. (Stamps is fun, but its still a lot of thinking which equals work to me) Then I got home and spent a tulmultulous two weeks with Andrea. We fought alot. She wasn't happy and I didn't care. I was too caught up in my "extended biological family, why me, why now, why?" to remotely care. That's when I got another call.
We were at a Christy Sutherland concert when my phone blew up. It was Meg, but I ignored it all the way through the concert and home. I got in the door, and Andre went into our guest bedroom and I sat down with my laptop to talk to mom, and when I opened it I saw. Stephen Hill had a massive heart attack and was gone. DEVISTATION! Again I collapsed, but the whole time it seemed I could hear Satan laughing in my face it was the craziest thing. The next morning Andrea called to tell me she was unhappy and was leaving to go pursue other interests.
Not knowing what to do or where to go next, I went to Texas for what was supposed to be two weeks, that turned into five months, and I loved it. Singing almost every weekend it seemed, and God was providing it was great, but I still had the shadows looming overhead of previous experiences. Then, through some circumstances I'll never quite be able to understand, I wound up sleeping in my car, and in an empty house, thinking about a mother that gave me up, my "best friend" who abandoned me when I felt like life was crumbling, "You'll never amount to anything". In the midst I though about Stephen, and another frind from Stamps a 20 year old kid named Trent who'd passed, and I just wasn't doing well. Enter my little sister Selena.
When I was a kid, I'd always wanted siblings. Sure, only child is fun but its lonely. I remember talking to my little sister Selena, and hearing how she'd known about me forever and wanted to meet me. I'd never had someone WANT to meet ME so bad. Some things were happening down south and I decided rather than be in the way. I'd come home and meet my little sister.
During this time period, and I can't explain why I've latched on to these people so much, I usually don't, but they've been kind to me, and talked to me late at night, and let me harass them. The Perrys are good folks, well one of my favorite people Tracy Stuffle suffered a stroke in January, and is just now it seems starting to come out of it, and that ones been getting to me a lot more than I anticipated. I've cried and squalled, and prayed and so on. He's a really cool guy and I hate that this has happened, but I know its for a reason. He'll come out of this and be able to help stroke patients or something. I do though this family, Deb, Chris, Lib, Tracy, Joseph, Bryan, Troy, and Bryan have been wonderful to me over the years.
Anyway...back to my year. I did finally meet my biological mother, and found out some things which explain some things that I don't know that I'll share in my blog, but I will ask for your prayers for me, and her, and my 3 other siblings.
Well there you have my whirlwind crazy year from July to June....OH!!! BTW my solo ministry turns 4 this year!!!! June 10th. YAY!!!!